Around the bend…

I have been thinking about this crazy journey we all call life lately...
Our own individual paths. How we intersect with each others lives. How people come and go. I think of the many people that have entered my life that would probably never have been a part of it if David had not gotten sick. Had not died. And yet, here they are. Amazing friends who have decided to walk with me for awhile.

And the many old friends and family who have astonishingly decided to stay on, despite how incredibly dark and dirty this road got. They have helped me traverse the pot holes and the quagmires that threatened to pull me under. They picked me up when I fell down and when I could not stand…they sat with me in the dirt while I cried.

I think about this so often and am continuously astounded. Some of them saw things that people should never have to see or experience. And yet they did, because they were my friends and they did not want me to have to go it alone. And despite all that has happened, we continue on. Some have meandered off my path and onto others. Some may return…and some may very well never. And I am finding I am ok with that. Many more have joined me than have dropped off and I have found that I have some amazingly strong, beautiful people in my life. We are all walking along…we are all walking different paths. But at least we are doing it together. No one should walk alone for long.

And I am finding that none of us really know what is around the bend. I take great comfort in knowing that there are others out there continuing forward no matter what obstacles or crap have fallen onto their paths. We just climb over it, or go around it or turn into an entirely different direction…taking us to places we never expected or intended to go. And along the way there are indelibly new adventures awaiting us! New paths. New experiences. Unforeseen and delightful surprises.

I am learning to try not to fear so much about the future. It will be there. It is not going anywhere. It is waiting for me…whatever it may be. But it is there. I still have a future. It lays spread out before me. It was not the future I was planning. It is not where I intended to be, but it is there.

Much of it is obscured in unknowns and much of it lies further down the path than I can see. Sometimes I try to stand up on my tip toes, straining to see what lies ahead. But the distance is too great, so now I must just dance along my own path and see what comes. Trying all the while to embrace the anticipation of the limitless possibilities and unknowns that await me around the bend.